Grief Isn’t Linear: Be Kind to Yourself While Healing

By Art Kuhns – Breaking Day Hypnotherapy

Grief is one of life’s most universal experiences—and yet it’s often one of the most misunderstood. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a pet, a job, or even a dream, grief shows up in our lives in deeply personal ways. And still, many of us feel pressure to rush through it or “stay strong” for others.

But the truth is: grief isn’t linear. And healing takes time, space, and, above all, compassion.

When I Forgot How to Grieve

A few years ago, I lost my mother in February. There wasn’t much time to process what had happened. I had services to plan, a house to clean out, and console my sister, who was facing her own serious health challenges. I pushed my emotions aside and focused on what needed to be done.

Just a few months later, my sister passed away as well.

By then, I had become so good at suppressing my emotions that I realized something painful, I didn’t know how to grieve anymore. I was stuck in survival mode, disconnected from my own heart.

Thankfully, some kind people reminded me of something simple yet profound:

“Be kind to yourself. It’s okay to feel.”

The Healing Power of Allowing

When I began giving myself permission to feel, something surprising happened.

The sadness would rise up like a wave then drift away. I found that when I stopped resisting my emotions, they didn’t last as long or weigh as heavily. Sometimes guilt or regret would surface. In those moments, I learned to gently redirect my thoughts to a positive memory. A moment of laughter. A time of love.

Slowly, the grief softened. And in its place, something else began to grow, gratitude.

Now, when memories of my mom or sister arrive, they bring warmth. I smile and say, “Hi Mom” or “Hey Sis.” I imagine them watching over me. It feels like a quiet connection that still exists, and it leaves me feeling peaceful.

Grief Doesn’t Need to Be Fixed—It Needs to Be Felt

If you’re going through grief right now, I want to remind you:

• You don’t have to rush your healing.
• You don’t need to have it all together.
• And you’re allowed to feel everything, anger, sadness, confusion, even moments of joy.
  

Let your heart unfold in its own time. Be kind. Be patient. Be present.

Let the Love Linger Longer Than the Loss

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means honoring your emotions, your memories, and the love that remains.

If you’re feeling stuck in your grief—or just want someone to talk to—I’m here. I offer gentle, supportive tools like mindfulness, self-hypnosis, and guided meditation to help you move forward with peace and self-compassion.

Let’s talk: Schedule your Free 20 phone consultation today….

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