Self-Love: The Foundation for Real Change
Over the past six years, I’ve worked with clients on everything from quitting smoking and overcoming anxiety to weight loss and more. And you know what I’ve discovered? There’s a common thread that runs through nearly every issue: self-love—or more often, the lack of it.
Now, self-love might sound like a small thing… but it’s not. In fact, it’s the foundation for creating lasting change in nearly every area of our lives.
Do You Really Love Yourself?
Let me ask you: Do you really love yourself?
You might quickly answer, “Of course I do!” But pause for a second. Do you really treat yourself and speak to yourself with the same love and respect you’d offer a dear friend?
Try This Simple Self-Love Test
- Close your eyes and take a deep, relaxing breath. Let your body soften and unwind.
- Now, imagine looking at yourself in the mirror as you’re getting ready for the day.
- Gently, look into your own eyes and say: “I love you. I love you.”
- Take another deep breath… and open your eyes.
How did that feel?
Uncomfortable? You’re not alone. It was for me too.
Now Let’s Fall in Love with YOU again!
My Early Struggles with Self-Love
I grew up in a family with English and German roots. In our household, love wasn’t openly shown, and acceptance seemed to disappear the moment I didn’t meet my parents’ expectations. I learned quickly to stay on alert—focused on what others thought of me. I didn’t want to rock the boat, because if I did, I feared they’d stop loving me.
That kind of insecurity easily spilled into my other relationships. I had thin boundaries and a hard time saying “no.” I constantly worried:
What if I upset someone? What if they didn’t like me anymore? Would my mom still love me?
I was putting everyone else first. My own self-love was last on the list—if it even made the list at all.
Self-Love is the Key to Transformation
As I began working more deeply with clients, I saw just how powerful self-love really is. It’s the gateway to accepting yourself, respecting yourself, and taking full responsibility for your life.
At the Hypno-Thoughts Live 2021 conference, I attended Martin Castor’s 3-day practitioner certification on Addiction Behavioral Modification. One technique we learned focused entirely on developing self-love. And let me tell you—it was a game changer.
We practiced the exercise with each other, and the effect it had on me was profound. During the exercise, my intention was on food patterns, but the shift reached into so many areas of my life. My relationship with food changed… but so did my daily choices and how I saw myself.
When We Don’t Love Ourselves…
Self-love touches every part of our lives—especially how we see ourselves. When you look in the mirror, are your thoughts kind or critical? I used to be really harsh with myself. I believed that hating my body would motivate me to improve it.
Spoiler alert: it didn’t.
When we don’t like ourselves, we often don’t respect ourselves. And without self-respect, our choices begin to reflect that:
“I don’t like me, so who cares?”
“I want this now—it’ll make me feel better.”
…And on and on.
Self-Love Leads to Self-Respect and Empowerment
When we do begin to love ourselves, things start to shift. That love leads to self-respect and acceptance. And from that place, we start making decisions that support and uplift us.
You might find yourself thinking:
“I love myself just as I am—and I take responsibility for creating something even better.”
Now that is the kind of energy that transforms lives.
Letting Go of Approval-Seeking
Here’s something else that happens:
You stop chasing approval from others.
When you truly love and respect yourself, you no longer feel the need to prove anything. You can say with confidence:
“This is who I am. Love me or move on.”
Can you feel the strength in that?
Self-Love Strengthens Boundaries
Self-love helps you set strong boundaries. It helps you say “no” when you need to—and feel good about it.
I like to think of self-love as a superpower. And once you tap into it, you start to notice other powers awakening too—like:
- Open, honest communication
- Putting yourself first (in a balanced way)
- And maybe one of the most important: self-forgiveness
Yes, Forgive Yourself
Forgiveness isn’t just something we extend to others. We must offer it to ourselves too.
Forgive yourself for the past, for the present, and even for the future—because you will make mistakes. That’s just part of growth.
It happens. So let it go
What Other Superpowers Are Waiting for You?
The more you love yourself, the more hidden strengths begin to bloom.
So… how do you start cultivating self-love every day?
Try adding simple, nurturing practices to your routine:
- Take a walk—especially in nature
- Nap when your body needs it
- Eat nourishing foods
- Drink plenty of water
- Meditate, do yoga, journal, or explore a creative hobby
- Practice daily gratitude
And most of all: allow yourself to be YOU.
Love and respect your beautiful, unique self.
Ready for a Deeper Self-Love Journey?
If you’d like support on your self-love path, I’ve created a guided audio recording that helps release self-love blockages and strengthens your inner connection to love, worth, and power.
Click here to listen and begin your Self-Love Journey: [Insert Link]
Let’s start unlocking those superpowers—one loving step at a time. 
For a personalized Self-Love Journey experience, schedule your free consultation call here [free consult call]
Art Kuhns Certified Hypnotherapist and Reiki Master/Teacher
Art is a certified hypnotherapist and Reiki master teacher. He received his hypnotherapy certification from Hypnosis Motivation Institute.
Art’s passion is to empower others to find and unlock their own healer and personal power. Once this power is unleashed, a life of intention and balance in mind /body/spirit can unfold. He uses Reiki infused hypnosis during his session work to enable clients to connect intuitively and heal holistically.
He holds additional certifications in PTSD, Smoking Cessation, Inner Child Healing, Addition & Behavior Modification and Spiritual Hypnosis.